Friday, 21 July 2017

Fucking boring. Wintersun "Forest Seasons" review

better than the original artwork.


A new Wintersun album, band that started legendary and then fell into the dark slumber. Will this album be able to get them back to Melodic death metal world? Or just kill the whole thing before Time II will be finished?

Shitty, plastic artwork and the fact that unlike Time II we didn't hear about this album being made until late this year are worrying, it looks like something Jari did in his free time in his basement that they have to sell to Nuclear Blast so NB won't kick their asses out. But open-minded and with tiny bit of hope I sit down with best quality master wav files and good headphones, let's take a look.

Awaken From The Dark Slumber

It starts with some atmospherical intro with candy-like  Time 1 soft orchestrations

then drums hit it along with some really crappy black metal guitars with various synths in the background. It stays for a long time, too long for me and I like to watch or listen to some 10 hour version videos so it says a lot.
Vocals hit it with decent power and spelling, Jari got even better than on Time 1.
The background for vocals is much richer with guitars.
Considering how long and boring this song it's definitely black metal done wrong.

IT'S SO FUCKING BORING.

After a while it sounds like the background on equilibrium live shows with bad audio setting: plastic, loud and out of place.

And now more distorted black metal guitar, great.
And now a long, boring part where nothing interesting happens.

WHY SO LONG, WHY SO BORING? Were You ever bored on the first album?
Or Time 1? Yes Jari, play live a song where part 1 and 2 of the song are divided by boring instrumental part that last hours.
At least the vocals are good.

Overall not much happens, the guitars and drums are boring, Jari tries to tell the story and add some typical live sing along stuff and it doesn't really work, they come around 9th minute and the audience should already be asleep at this point.

Some of it reminds me of Winter's Gate, so if You somehow like this track please check out last Insomnium's album if You havent.

The song is Starchild with less fancy build, add the boring, stretched parts of Beautiful Death to it and copy paste instrumental parts to fill 12 minutes with it.

The vocals are great, lyrics are some pointless crap like on Sons of Winter and Stars, but there are no fancy drums or guitars or bass. It's all closer to black metal than ever before which I guess justifies why this music is so fucking long, boring and nothing memorable happens. The melody's pretty dull too.

The Forest That Weeps

"I am the worms in the dirt"
...You mean Wintersun fans?

Intro slightly more interesting than in the previous song but also stretched to the point of yawning.
Guitars still sound like black metal rhythm guitar with broken amplifier and a few strings missing
And vocals fail to appear in over 2 minutes.

After a verse of again good vocals the "epic riff" happens and still sounds fucking dull, just as on the video. Thankfully the choirs with Jari that follow are pretty good.
Lyrics are also a bit more interesting than before, maybe because the whole music has a much better melody than the previous track.
I wonder if Kai didn't asleep when recording drums, this sounds really boring. Maybe playing in Nightwish helps to cope with boring drum parts.

Uh oh, I thought that the song ended and it's around half. Boring instrumental part time!

At least after some repeating of some melody the guitars hit it hard and finally doesn't sound like shit.
But no solo happens, fuck solos. It's only Jari Maenpaa, one of previously best guitarists I knew.
And now you made me hate that guitars joined the instrumental part, because it's wide, it's stretched, it got boring after 30 seconds.
Some turisas-ish outro joins with badly mixed volume (way too loud than the rest) and good choirs that follow.

Why does it have to be that long? Sons of Winter and Stars were long, but they were packed with lyrics, memorable moments, walls of sound. This just doesn't work, the song is as long but has around 2 times less lyrics so it has to either repeat some parts to the point where the listener is bored or stretch out every element adding some extra seconds to parts that start good and interesting, but then get fucking boring.
Unlike the previous song this one has some more redeeming parts, it could be a good song if it was max 8 minutes long..
I bet there is nothing to discover here after multiple listens, on the first listen You can see the whole image and structure.

Eternal Darkness

Another stretched intro, this time less interesting with even more obnoxious black metal guitar
 (amps on fire, amps on fire, hurting ears with desire!)

I think Jukka is snoring or burping on the intro, not surprising

Enter the washing machine drums, later lyrics and some sounds in the background that are barely audible.
Remember when we all said that Time 1 needs more solos? Jari didn't, there are no solos so far and close to no riffs.
BORING AND STRETCHED, BORING AND STRETCHED. I'M DONE

Vocals: 10/10
Guitars: 2/10
Bass:   -1/10
Drums:   2/10

Additional score:
+ Choirs and vocal mixing is good
- style shift to boring as fuck black metal
- I didn't pay for it and I feel robbed, mostly of time
= I had low expectations from a rushed album like that but it's worse than I thought. I thought
a perfectionist like Jari wouldn't release something that fucking boring.
Wanna do atmospherical metal? Check out Swallow The Sun. Check out Insomnium. Wanna add some good black metal stuff to melodic death? Check out Whispered.
- overhyped beyond reason by both the band and the fans.

Total score: 25%. I wasn't able to finish listening it, I was bored beyond reason. Wintersun can always make me feel something new and unexpected and they didn't fail. It was the first time I got so bored while listening to something Jari made.

This review was crap, but You know what? Listening to low quality music doesn't make me wanna try hard and be a good reviewer.

Sunday, 11 June 2017

List of albums I have, 2017 version


I need a list so I remember what I have and some of my friends need this to know what can they buy me as a gift

Aephanemer- Know Thyself (EP, signed)
Aephanemer- Memento Mori (digipack)
Alestorm- Captain's Morgan Revenge (jewelcase, my sister's actually)
Alestorm- Leviathan (EP, jewelcase)
Alestorm- Black Sails At Midnight (digipack)
Alestorm- Back Through Time (digipack)
Alestorm- Live At The End Of The World (live dvd, signed)
Alestorm- Sunset On The Golden Age (digipack)
Alestorm- No Grave But The Sea (digipack)
Amon Amarth- With Oden On Our Side (jewelcase, signed)
Apocalyptica- 7th Symphony (digipack)
Avatar- Feathers & Flesh (digipack)

Babymetal- Babymetal (limited japanese version, jewelcase)
Babymetal- Metal resistance (european version, jewelcase)
Battle Beast- Unholy Savior (digipack, signed)
Behemoth- Evangelion (digipack)
Black Sabbath- Never Say Die (live dvd)
Blind Guardian- Somewhere Far Beyond (jewelcase)
Blind Guardian- Beyond The Red Mirror (jewelcase)

Cain's Offering- Gather The Faithful (European Version, jewelcase)
Cain's Offering- Gather The Faithful (Japanese Version, jewelcase)
Cain's Offering- Stormcrow (Japanese Version, signed jewelcase)
Charon- Sorrowburn (jewelcase)
Children of Boredom- Halo Of Blood (digipack)

Delain- Lucidity (jewelcase)
Delain- Lucidity (10th anniversary digipack)
Delain- April Rain (digipack)
Delain- Get The Devil Out Of Me (single)
Delain- We Are The Others (digipack)
Delain- Interlude (EP, digipack)
Delain- The Human Contradiction (digipack, signed)
Delain- Lunar Prelude (EP, digipack, signed)
Delain- Moonbathers (digipack, signed)
Dio- Holy Diver (jewelcase)
Dio- The Last In Line (jewelcase)
Dio- Sacred Heart (jewelcase)
Dio- Dream Evil (jewelcase)
Dio- Lock Up The Wolves (jewelcase)
Dio- Evil or Devine (live dvd)
Dio- Angry Machines (russian pirated copy with Elf album, jewelcase)
Dio- Killing The Dragon (2 in 1 jewelcase)
Dio- Magicka (2 i 1 jewelcase)
Dio- Master Of The Moon (jewelcase)
Dreamshade- The Gift Of Life (jewelcase, signed)
Dreamshade- Vibrant (jewelcase)
Dragonforce- The Power Within (jewelcase, signed)
Dragonforce- Maximum Overload (digipack)
Dragonforce- In The Line Of Fire (digipack, live cd&dvd)
Dragonforce- In The Line Of Fire (dvd, live dvd. Bought it twice because I'm retarded)
Dragonforce- Reaching Into Infinity (digipack)

Edguy- Tinnitus Sanctus (jewelcase)
Enceladus- Time In A Dream (single, signed)
Enceladus- Journey To Enlightenment (jewelcase, signed)
Epica- Requiem For The Indifferent (digipack)
Equilibrium- Armageddon (digipack)

Finntroll- Blodsvept (digipack)
Freedom Call- Eternity (digipack)

Galneryus- The Flag Of Punishment (slipcase)
Galneryus- Advance To The Fall (slipcase)
Galneryus- Live For Rebirth (live dvd)
Galneryus- Alsatia (single)
Galneryus- Kizuna (EP)
Galneryus- Hunting For Your Dream (Type B, single)
Galneryus- Attitude To Life (single)
Gamma Ray- Empire Of The Undead (jewelcase)
Gloryhammer- Tales From The Kingdom Of Fife (digipack)
Gloryhammer- Space 1992: Rise Of The Chaos Wizards (digipack, signed)
Grai- Warmot the Bitter Glass (digipack)
Grai- O Zemle Rodnoy (digipack)
Grai- Mlada (digipack)
Gunsen- Adventure On The Devil's Note (digipack, signed)

Hammerfall- Threshold (digipack)
Hammerfall- Steel Meets Steel (compilation, digipack)
Hammerfall- Infected (digipack)
Hammerfall- Gates Of Dalhalla (live bluray&cd)
Hammerfall- (r)Evolution (digipack)
Heaven & Hell- The Devil You Know (jewelcase)
Heaven & Hell- Radio City Live Music Hall (live dvd)
Helloween- Keeper Of The Seven Keys Part I (digipack)
Helloween- Keeper Of The Seven Keys Part II (digipack)
Helloween- 7 Sinners (digipack)
Helloween- Unarmed (jewelcase)
Helloween- Straight Out Of Hell (digipack)
Helloween- My God Given Right (digipack)

Insomnium- One For Sorrow (slipcase, signed)
Insomnium- Shadows Of The Dying Sun (digipack)

Kabanos- Na Pudle (digipack, signed)
Kalmah- Swamplord (2 in 1 jewelcase)
Kalmah- They Will Return (2 in 1 jewelcase)
Kalmah- Seventh Swamphony (digipack)
King Diamond- Abigail II: The Revenge (jewelcase)
King Diamond- Fatal Portrait (5 in 1 digipack)
King Diamond- Abigail (5 in 1 digipack)
King Diamond- Them (5 in 1 digipack)
King Diamond- Conspiracy (5 in 1 digipack)
King Diamond- The Eye (5 in 1 digipack)
Korpiklaani- Manala (digipack, signed)
Korpiklaani- Noita  (digipack)
Kotipelto- Serenity (Digipack)
Kotipelto&Liimatainen- Blackoustic (Digipack, signed)

Led Zeppelin- The Song Remains The Same (live dvd)
Lux Perpetua- The Curse Of The Iron King (digipack, signed)

Nightwish- Elan (single, digipack)
Nightwish- Imaginaerum (digipack)
Nightwish- Endless Forms Most Beautiful (digipack)
Nordheim- Refill (jewelcase)
Norther- Circle Regenerated (digipack)

Omnium Gatherum- Steal The Light (demo ep, 2 in 1 digipack)
Omnium Gatherum- Spirits And August Light (2 in 1 digipack)
Omnium Gatherum- Beyond (jewelcase)
Omnium Gatherum- Grey Heavens (jewelcase, signed)
One Punch Man- One Take Man (original soundtrack, jewelcase)
Orca- Aquarium (single)
Orca- Amber (single)
Orca- Universe (digipack, signed)
Ozzy Osbourne- Speak Of The Devil (live cd, jewelcase)
Ozzy Osbourne- Scream (eco digipack)

Pathfinder- Demo 2008 The Beginning (need to return it)
Pathfinder- Beyond The Space, Beyond The Time (jewelcase)
Pathfinder- Fifth Element (Japanese version, jewelcase)
Pathfinder- Fifth Element (European version, digipack)
Percival Schuttenbach- Svantevit (digipack, signed)
Percival Schuttenbach- Mniejsze Zło (digipack)
Persefone- Shin-Ken (jewelcase)
Persefone- Aathma (digipack)
Powerwolf- Return In Bloodred (jewelcase)
Powerwolf- Lupus Dei (jewelcase)
Powerwolf- Blood Of The Saints (jewelcase)
Powerwolf- Wolfsnachte 2015 Tour EP (jewelcase)
Powerwolf- Preachers of The Night (digipack, signed)
Powerwolf- Blessed&Possessed (jewelcase)
Powerwolf- The Metal Mass Live (live bluray & cd)

Radogost- Dark Side Of The Forest (digipack, signed)

Silent Hell- Drama (digibook, signed)
Sinatra Frank- Best Of (jewelcase)
Skalmold- Baldur (jewelcase)
Skalmold- Born Loka (digipack, signed)
Skalmold & Sinfoniu-Hljomsveit Islands (live dvd)
Skalmold- Med Vaetum (digipack, signed)
Skalmold- Vogguvisur Yggdrasils (digipack)
Sonata Arctica- Ecliptica (jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Silence (jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Songs of Silence Live in Tokyo (live cd, jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Winterheart's Guild (Japanese version, jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Takatalvi (EP, jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Don't Say A Word (single, jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Reckoning Night (jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- For The Sake of Revenge (live dvd/cd, jewelcase)
Sonata Arctica- Unia (European Digipack)
Sonata Arctica- The Days of Grays (European Digipack, signed)
Sonata Arctica- Live in Finland (live dvd)
Sonata Arctica- I Have A Right (single, signed digipack)
Sonata Arctica- Stones Grow Her Name (European Digibook)
Sonata Arctica- Pariah Child (European Digipack)
Sonata Arctica- Ecliptica Revisited (European Digipack)
Sonata Arctica- The Ninth Hour (European Digipack)
Sonus Vena- Sonus Vena (?, signed)
Starkill- Fires Of Life (jewelcase, signed)
Stratovarius- Infinite (2 in 1 digipack)
Stratovarius- Intermission (EP, 2 in 1 digipack)
Stratovarius- Elements Part I  (Digipack)
Stratovarius- Elements Part II (Digipack)
Stratovarius- Polaris (Limited Digipack)
Stratovarius- Elysium (Holo Digipack)
Stratovarius- Under Flaming Winter Skies (live bluray)
Stratovarius- Unbreakable (EP, digipack)
Stratovarius- Nemesis (Digipack)
Stratovarius- Eternal (Digipack, signed)
Sunrise- Through The Eyes Of Infinity (live dvd)
Swallow The Sun- Emerald Forest And The Blackbird (jewelcase)
Swallow The Sun- Songs From The North Part I (3 in 1 digipack)
Swallow The Sun- Songs From The North Part II (3 in 1 digipack)
Swallow The Sun- Songs From The North Part III (3 in 1 digipack)

Tarot- The Spell Of Iron MMXI (slipcase)
Tenacious D- Tenacious D (jewelcase, co-owned)
Tenacious D- The Pick Of Destiny (jewelcase, co-owned)
Tenacious D- Rize Of The Phoenix (digipack, co-owned)
Therion- Theli (jewelcase)
Therion- Garden Of Evil (live dvd, digipack, signed)
Thermit- Saints (digishit, signed, I can give this shit away)
Titanium- Titanium (Japanese version, jewelcase)
Titanium- Atomic Number 22 (Japanese version, jewelcase)
Trollfest- Willkommen Folk Tell Drekka Fest (jewelcase)
Trollfest- Brakebein (digipack)
Trollfest- Uraltes Elemente (EP, jewelcase)
Trollfest- Villanden (jewelcase)
Trollfest- En Kvest For Den Hellige Gral (digipack, signed)
Trollfest- Brumblebassen (digipack)
Trollfest- Kaptein Kaos (digipack)
Trollfest- Helluva (digipack)
Turisas- Battle Metal (jewelcase)
Turisas- Stand Up And Fight (digipack)
Turisas- A Finnish Summer With Turisas (live dvd)
Turisas- Turisas2013 (digipack)
Twilight Force- Tales Of Ancient Prophecies (jewelcase, signed)

Unisonic- Ignition (EP, digipack)
Unisonic- Light Of Dawn (jewelcase)

Whispered- Thousand Swords (jewelcase)
Whispered- Shogunate Macabre (jewelcase)
Whispered- Metsutan (jewelcase)
Wintersun- Wintersun (jewelcase)
Wintersun- Time I (digipack, signed)
Wolf Spider- It's Your Time (single/EP, signed)

Summary: 203 albums total, about 50 less than I thought I have (well, I gave away over 50)

Others:

Downloaded for money:
TrollfesT- Villanden (before I bought a physical cd)
Enceladus- Time In A Dream (single, bought a physical signed copy too)
Sydanpuu- Majla single (single, download only)

given away:
multiple Aephanemer, Titanium, Pathfinder, Enceladus and Gunsen albums
Rhapsody Of Fire- The Frozen Tears Of Angels (digipack)
Rhapsody Of Fire- From Chaos To Eternity (digipack)
Korpiklaani- Ukon Wacka (jewelcase)
Apocalyptica- 7th Symphony (eco digipack)
Pathfinder- Beyond The Space, Beyond The Time (digipack)
Nine Inch Nails- WITH_TEETH (digipack)
Dio- Dream Evil (limited jewelcase)
Behemoth- Evangelion (digipack)
Insomnium- The Shadows Of The Dying Sun (jewelcase)
Insomnium- Winter's Gate (limited audiobook version)
Internal Quiet- When The Rain Comes Down (slipcase, horrible piece of shit)

Thrown away or destroyed because they suck ass:

Bartosz Ogrodowicz- Forsaken (jewelcase piece of shit)
Amon Sethis- The Legend Of The Seventh Dynasty (EP, jewelcase piece of shit, signed)
Wolf Spider- V (digipack piece of shit)

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

Typical oldschool blog post about life, death, universe and the meaning of burrito

Everytime someone wants to talk to me about the meaning of life, death, god or something about the understanding of the universe in general I feel really tired.

We've all been there, we questioned stuff, we wondered, we had our theories, our brain produced some illusions like people seeing stuff that most probably wasn't there. Can science prove that God doesn't exist? No. Does it mean that the God exists? Also no. Can science prove that holy books were wrong in many aspects? Yes. Can we prove everything with science? Most probably not. There will always be stuff like Eridanus Supervoid, that we not only don't know what's it's purpose in the universe, but also what exactly is that stuff and how the stuff we know would react to it.

I spent too much time looking for some answers, to the point where I got angry. Angry that I spent so much time getting no answers, angry that I was too stupid to understand that I can spend a lifetime and not get any answers. I chose Apatheism as the only logical choice when it comes to faith, and decided to focus on doing something more valuable in my life than wondering about life greatest mysteries.

Some trippy, random thoughts I have after a bit of my research, basically my favourite wonders and stuff that keeps me up at night:

- we have no idea why we sleep. What is the purpose of our conscious control turning off. I'd say it's for the body and stamina to regenerate, since our brain is still active, probably in a different 'mode', sending us dreams and other visuals to keep us busy until we wake up. All we know for sure is that if we try not to sleep we eventually die. And I believe something like this  happens when we die- shit just turns off completely and we don't wake up. Grasping that concept is also fucking scary- You perceive nothing, feel nothing, remember nothing and basically every aspect of You id, ego, superego is nothing. From a programming point of view is like filling all the column in Your table with null values and then deleting the table itself.

- the fact that our eyes see shit in 2 dimensions and our brains construct that image into a 3d one. This for me was always extremely scary, because brains can be damaged and then we have no idea at what are we looking at. Try to imagine the visuals you might have when that part of our brains get broken. Blind spots in your eyesight are also scary, since our brains fill the lost information with something that can be bullshit

- if something is extremely distant then we don't see it as a 3d object. Just look at the moon sometimes. Moon is also a good example that we have no idea what are we looking at, since when it appears in our vision larger when it's position is low on the horizon we're seeing. It was a serious mindfuck for a teenage me when I learned that the moon being "bigger" on the sky doesn't mean it's closer.

- if we think about it a little bit we are all the jelly stuck in our skulls. All we remember, know, understand is stuck there in our brain. Brain, that can be damaged. It's not just the part of our bodies being damaged, like a broken arm, it's us personally. And it's fucking scary. It's scary that we just cannot put ourselves in the place of someone who has a Retrograde or Anterograde Amnesia. Their brains simply lose the ability to store neural information- it's sad and scary as fuck. When I grow very old I can be stuck on a wheelchair for what I care, but when these serious parts of my brain are damaged then just kill me, my existence will be shit at that point anyway.

- I'm thankful as fuck that negative mass is so far a purely theoretical concept, I think I would go insane if at one point it started to make "sense" in my brain

- even though we are all jelly, there is no way to know someone else's thoughts. Even the weird-ass shit books I read about misticism are only focused about predicting someone's bahavior, not understanding on the deeper level what the other person is thinking. Based on our experience and social interactions with that person we might predict some behaviors, but when we get to the core there is basically no way to know what that person would do in our place. They have their own view on morality, truth, fairness and so on. This is why "tell me what You think about is" is such an important question when someone asks you that, you just can't answer "isnt that obvious?".

And to end this post on something trippy, but not written by me (if we consider time the fourth dimension):

"If you could see yourself in the fourth dimension, you'd look like a huge worm made of every single version of yourself from every moment across your entire life. There would be your embryo at one end and your deceased self at the other. And all of this is without getting into the idea of branching pathways."

This post wasn't inspired by Expanding Brain Meme, but since it's an awesome meme I'll share one of my favourites: